Standing outside his office, all kinds of thoughts about an impending doom passed through my mind. It was the 8th standard and it was all started by Alex. And look at him, happily sitting inside the class and enjoying. Speaking about Alex, the guy was very vocal plus he had an extremely good vocabulary of swear words in English; in fact, I first heard the F word from him. So you can’t really argue with Alex, he will strip you down with his ear-ripping language.
It was another of those days when I got involved in an altercation with Alex, and as usual he just excoriated me and made me speechless. Mortified, dejected and depressed, I meekly went and sat beside Maximilian. An empathetic Maxi advised me that if I ever want to retaliate against Alex, I need to work on it. How? For starters, he said, one should go to the library, take the Tintin comics and search for all the dialogues of Captain Haddock. Seeing a ray of hope in Maxi’s words, the next interval, I ran to the library, took out a piece of paper, and filled the whole 2 pages with absolutely hair raising beautiful words such as ‘cachinnating cockatoo’, ‘blue blustering barnacles’, ‘gibbering anthropoid’, ‘macrocephalic baboon’, ‘thundering typhoons’ and the likes. Feeling completely satiated I went back to class and started memorizing all those words, coz next interval I’m going to pounce on Alex and annihilate him. Now, I was sitting in the corner right next to the window; the corridor ran next to it; and while I was juggling between memorizing the expletives and writing down what the teacher was writing on the board, a hand barged through inside the window and snatched the paper with me. The hand belonged to our Vice Principal, Fr. Edassery.
Me: "It isn’t…..I didn’t mean….that is, it was…..yak yak"
He carefully glanced through the paper, folded it, kept it in his pocket and walked away after asking me to meet him in the interval.
Standing outside his office, all kinds of thoughts about an impending doom passed through my mind. What am I going to do? How’s he going to respond? Will he call my parents? Will I get suspended? Oh man I’m screwed. The brief period of wait outside his door seemed like an eternity for me; well, Einstein's theory of relativity is true after all I guess.
As soon as I entered his room, I begged, I apologized, I pleaded to spare me this time, and told I will never repeat this ever again. I almost fell into his legs. After hearing all my melodramatic histrionics, Vice let a deep sigh, removed his specs, slowly wiped it with his kerchief and said,
"It’s not blustering barnacles, it’s ‘blistering’ barnacles."
13 comments:
Billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles!lol. Nice read :)
That is what I thought when I read it, that it is 'blistering' barnacles and that it was typo. Then realized as I read the last line that 'blistering barnacles' is etched in our conscience as a Tin Tin loving nation! :)
hehe...i love to say blistering barnacles!! infact one of my favourite swear words if i should say so!! ;-P
good that Fr.Edassery has a tintin heart in him!! :)
@arjun: Yeah, athu thanne, hehe. Thank you.
@silverine: Damn! I thought readers would barely notice that until they encounter the last sentence. I should've constructed the post in a more subtle way. I don't actually read Tintin; annoru aaveshathil nokkiyathanu.
@mathew: Hehe, I now prefer more hardcore versions, people won't get the effect intended otherwise ;) When Tintin and Archies were placed side by side in the school library rack, I had always chosen the latter.....you know....you can see some bikini clad girls. ;)
"When Tintin and Archies were placed side by side in the school library rack" - that's blasphemy!! TinTin is not a kiddo comic! #$%&@
@silverine: Yeah, calling Tintin a kiddo comic would be an insult to all kiddo comics :D (I hope no Tintin fans come across this comment)
YAAAY! God bless Fr. Edassery :)
Once, during the class excursion, people were watchin American Pie in the bus, assuming VP to be asleep.. The following morning the old man lets out a remark: "So u guys learnt a lot of stuff ystday eh??" :D
*sigh* Loyola it was :)
@sriram: Hehe....Some months ago, a few of us went to school, and we planned to go to a bar at night. Vice on hearing our intentions, "ennalum nee onnum enne invite cheyyilla alle". One of our batch mates, Cherian replies, "Oho, appum verutheyalla achane ingane kuda vayaru verunnathe, full time ivide irunne beer adi aanalle", and taps gently on Vice's belly. With who else can one take such freedoms.
Nee cheruppam muthale inganne aanu alle?
@deepti: pinnallaathe ;)
LOL@ending. Nice! :)
Btw, did you just take the GRE@"excoriated me and made me speechless. Mortified, dejected and depressed, I meekly went...." :p
Also, good idea@posting a teaser at the start a la news sites.
@karthik: Hehe, lingering effects maybe ;) Thank you :)
That was a really good one .....ur really good in narrating school life anecdotes...
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